The END! Is it really all that bad?
As we come to the end of another cycle, it is a good time for reflection.
Humans are creatures of attachment. Most of us carry deep and lasting attachments to people, items, comforts, ideas and ways of doing things. It is the way we bond, make relationships and meaning out of our lives.
But, what happens when something comes to an end?
A business, a failed relationship, an era or a dream is O.V.E.R. and has run its course? What happens when there is nothing left to do but realize the end has come whether you want it to or not? How do you detach and move forward in the best way possible? It really hinges on the situation for sure. Some endings are downright devastating. Mostly though the difference between a good ending or not, depends on your perspective.
Are endings really that bad?
This question reminds me of a saying, "It's not what happens to you, but what you do with what happens to you that makes a difference." In other words, it is your response to that ending that is going to determine how your transition time will fair.
It has been years, since I read the book, The Way of The Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman, so I am going to paraphrase. Dan had met a man that had lost his entire restaurant in a fire. He lost everything. As a practicing meditator he knew that to block the emotion of devastation would be equally as dangerous as allowing the emotion to rule his life. There was nothing he could do about the damage. What was done, was done. As a practice, this man gave himself permission to feel his grief, shock and anger for a relatively short period of time. When he was done experiencing his emotions fully, he chose to take this crises as an opportunity to grow and move on. Dan asked this man, did he not still yearn for his business he lost? The man replied that all he felt now was gratitude for the time spent in that experience and had developed a new direction in life that he never would have let himself have if the fire had not happened. He was at peace.
That lesson stuck with me. I have witnessed people who do not get through their "stuff" because they sit on their loss and do not let themselves feel fully the rapids of their emotional river, being ever mindful of "this too shall pass." On the contrary, those that can "let go and let God" or somehow trust and have courage in the transitions of life, are more readily able to move on and begin again.
Ah, the blessings of adversity, Such rich teaching moments can only come through the energies of loss, conflict and endings.
On the other side of every ending is a beginning. On the other side of a black hole is a shooting star. I think of a dandelion seed and how it allows itself to be carried by the wind to land where it can grow best.
Maybe it is time to look at what is around the bend, after the relationship is over, the job lay off, or on the proverbial downhill of a roller coaster. Yes, it may be scary but life may just be giving you the opportunity to rediscover something marvelous on the other side and about yourself.
Let go, trust and allow yourself to be carried. Endings are just beginnings in disguise. Happy New Year!
©. All Rights Reserved. Holly Shantara - Divining the Divine®️ On The Go Guidance & LifeStar Coaching®️ For The New Human